What's In A Dream Anyway?
by Mystrana
Summary: Stuck in a village with Naraku and Sesshoumaru, Kagome-tachi must put up with them . . . and their dreams too. ^-^ //Part two up!//
1. Part One

Well. *Blinks* This is different. Yup.  
~~What's In A Dream Anyway?~~  
(Setting. Somewhere out in a deserted village. A bunch of people, including Naraku, Sesshoumaru, Inuyasha, Miroku, Sango, Shippou, and Kagome are sitting in the middle of the village. They seem to be getting along OK)  
  
Inuyasha: "Sesshoumaru, go to hell."  
  
(Or not. Anyhow, they are all here because somehow this village has a aura around it that first lured them here, and then trapped them. Even Naraku)  
  
Kagome: (Yawns) "This is so mega boring! I think I'm going to get some sleep."  
  
Miroku: "Are you sure you'll be able to sleep with these demons around?" (Indicated Sesshoumaru, Naraku and Inuyasha) "I'll share your bed with you tonight to protect you if you'll agree to bea-" (Is cut off by Sango smacking him, leaving a huge red mark on his face)  
  
Sango: "Pervert! You'd better leave us alone tonight, all of you or we'll feed you to the demons." (She stalks off, to the house that she and Kagome were going to sleep in. After a moment, Kagome and Shippou follow)  
  
(The rest of the guys sit up, wearily looking at each other)  
  
Naraku: "Well, isn't this just so much fun." (Rolls his eyes)  
  
Inuyasha: "Go to hell."  
  
Sesshoumaru: "Dear brother, please DO come up with new insults. The same ones over and over tend to get so bored." (Yawns gracefully)  
  
Inuyasha: "Sure. Right. Whatever."  
  
Naraku: "You know, Sesshoumaru has a point."  
  
Inuyasha: "No he doesn't, no he doesn't!" (Pouts like a little kid)  
  
Miroku: "What's wrong now, Inuyasha?"  
  
Inuyasha: (Pouts) "I don't know any other insults."  
  
Naraku: (Laughs)  
  
Sesshoumaru: "Eventually they'll come to you, dear brother." (Smirks) "But until then, I'm afraid . . . you're a hopelessly stupid half-demon." (Pauses and stands) "I need my beauty sleep." (Walks off)  
  
Naraku: "See, Sesshoumaru has the right idea." (Walks off as well)  
  
Inuyasha: (Punches the ground) "It's not fair! He makes me so MAD!" (Punches the ground again, causing a minor earthquake)  
  
Mirkou: "Perhaps you'd better sleep on it. You might be able to come up with insults in the morning after a peaceful night of rest."  
  
Inuyasha: "Yeah. Sure." (The two of them go off to sleep)  
  
~~~  
  
(Now, for something a bit different, we shall visit dreams! First, Kagome's dream = We open in the high school, present time Japan. Kagome has about ten books and is trying to get to class on time)  
  
Kagome: "Ah! Crap! I'm gonna be so late! And on my first day back!"  
  
Voiceover: "Doesn't sometimes life seem to get so annoying?"  
  
?????: (Taps her on the shoulder) "Can I help?"  
  
Kagome: (Not turning around) "Hojo, that's a really nice offer but I know your class is on the other side of the school and . . ."  
  
Hojo: "Ah! You even know my schedule! It must be true love!" (Takes her books before she can stop him)  
  
Voiceover: "And sometimes, people meaning to help only get you more frustrated?"  
  
Kagome: "Um, Hojo? I really don't need the help, and no sense in BOTH of us being late and . . ."  
  
Hojo: (Not really listening) "I realize it must be so hard for you, what with just getting over diabetes and the grippe."  
  
Kagome: (Sweatdrops) "Umm, yeah."  
  
Hojo: "So would you like to go out and see a movie after school?"  
  
Kagome: (Opens her mouth to say No) "Yes." (Pause) "Hey, I didn't say that!"  
  
Hojo: "What was that?"  
  
Kagome: "Just a second." (She goes, and around the hallway, Shippou is there, imitating her voice)  
  
Shippou: (Imitating her voice) "Oh, of course I'll go out with you Hojo, but only because Inuyasha isn't here right now! I just love Inuyasha because he is so amazing!"  
  
Voiceover: "Sometimes if feels like your life is simply out of control."  
  
Kagome: "Shippou-chan? What are you doing here?"  
  
Shippou: "Ummm, nothing?"  
  
Inuyasha: "I brought him here."  
  
Kagome: "Ack! Inuyasha! What are you doing here?"  
  
Inuyasha: (Shrugs) "Boredom."  
  
Voiceover: "But there is something you can do."  
  
Hojo: (Comes around the corner) "My, Kagome, do you know these two . . . erm, girls?"  
  
Inuyasha: "WHAT? I AM NOT A GIRL!"  
  
Shippou: "NEITHER AM I!"  
  
(They both attack him and Hojo squeaks)  
  
Hojo: (Being attacked) "Ack! AcK! I'm sorry! I didn't realize! It was the bow! And the long hair! And the - OUCH!"  
  
Kagome: (Sweatdrops largely)  
  
Voiceover: "And that is. . . ."  
  
Inuyasha: (Even as he's attacking Hojo) "Kagome, will you marry me?"  
  
Kagome: (Blinks)  
  
Hojo: "No, Kagome, don't marry this girl!" (Is smacked by Inuyasha)  
  
Inuyasha: "Well, what do you say? Yes or no?"  
  
Kagome: (Blinks) (Attempts to say 'but I need time to think')  
  
Kagome's voice: "YES! I love you Inuyasha!"  
  
Inuyasha: "Great, then it's all settled!"  
  
Kagome: "But I didn't say that! Shippou said it, pretending to be me!"  
  
Inuyasha: (Pauses and then shrugs) "Well, that's ok. Anyhow, Sesshoumaru can be the best man and . . ." (He walks off talking about the wedding, leaving Hojo in a bloody mess on the ground, and Shippou dancing happily. The bell rings for class)  
  
Kagome: "Dammit."  
  
Voiceover: "Marriage makes everything better."  
  
(Now, we shall switch over to another dream . . . yes, it's time for Sango's dream! Her dream opens up in a very familiar scene; Miroku standing by a girl, while Sango watches)  
  
Sango: "Miroku!"  
  
Miroku: (Ignoring Sango) (To the girl) "Fair lady, would you honor me by agreeing to bear my child?"  
  
Lady: "Well, certainly! I know that I can trust you to be a loving father and a caring husband."  
  
Miroku: "Great! Then it's set up!" (Turns to Sango) "Sango, would you like to be our maid of honor?"  
  
Sango: (Blinks) "Miroku? Is that really you?"  
  
Miroku: "Yes, of course it is."  
  
Lady: "You're so amazing Miroku!"  
  
Sango: "Miroku! You can't!"  
  
Miroku: "Can't what?"  
  
Sango: "You can't marry her! I want to marry you-" (Pauses) "Actually, I just want you for other things, so go ahead and we can still have fun later." (Smirks)  
  
Miroku: "You bet." (he walks off with the girl)  
  
(Shippou appears)  
  
Shippou: "Sango, why do you put up with him anyway?"  
  
Sango: (Whispers something to Shippou)  
  
Shippou: "Sango! That's not something I'd expect you to say!"  
  
Sango: "Well, it's true. The other morning when I woke up, he was right there, and holding -"  
  
Shippou: (Whines) "Sango!!!"  
  
Sango: "What?"  
  
Shippou: "All this talk about how you love him bringing you breakfast in bed is making me hungry!"  
  
Voiceover: "Breakfast in Bed. Nothing says I love you more."  
  
(And at that, we shall switch to another dream. Yup, guess who! Sesshoumaru, that's who! His dream opens in a steamy bathroom, a very fancy one, where he is in the tub and there are lots of bubbles and steam all over)  
  
Sesshoumaru: "I feel so pretty! Oh so pretty!"  
  
(He is washing out his hair)  
  
Voiceover: "Do you feel pretty? Do you want to keep feeling pretty?"  
  
(Shots are shown of Sesshoumaru fighting, his hair fanning out gracefully behind him)  
  
Sesshoumaru: "Oh no! I can't find my bubbly rose shampoo!" (Curses and looks around for it, not finding it)  
  
Voiceover: "There's only one way to feel pretty and that is . . ."  
  
Sesshoumaru: "DAMMIT! DAMMIT! MORE DAMMITS! I CAN'T FIND MY ROSE SHAMPOO!" (He gets out of the tub and storms off. All of the girls from nowhere sigh happily)  
  
Voiceover: "Rose shampoo. Can't you just feel the tension washing off?" (Sesshoumaru runs by, still naked, chasing Shippou, who has his shampoo)  
  
(Yes, there are still more dreams to go to. Now we're at Naraku's dream. It opens in a dark dungeon)  
  
Naraku: (Sleeps)  
  
(Time passes)  
  
Naraku: (Sleeps)  
  
(Time passes)  
  
Naraku: (Sleeps)  
  
(Time passes)  
  
Naraku: (Wakes up)  
  
(Time passes)  
  
Naraku: (in that, 'you can get help' voice) "Did you ever notice how sometimes in your dreams you wake up only to find you were dreaming that you were asleep? In my opinon, that is just a very stupid thing. Who actually dreams they are dreaming? See, here I am in this abandoned village and . . ." (Trails off and looks around) (Pales) "I'm still dreaming, aren't I?"  
  
Sesshoumaru: "Very observant of you."  
  
Naraku: "Sesshoumaru?"  
  
Sesshoumaru: "Sometimes people just need to say things . . . and . . . Naraku . . . I love you!"  
  
Naraku: "WHAT?"  
  
Sesshoumaru: (Says nothing) (His head falls forward) (With a small pop, Shippou appears)  
  
Shippou: "Ah, dammit! It's so hard to stay like him for long." (Peers at an angry Naraku) "Ummm, hi?"  
  
Voiceover: "Do you ever get those annoying urges to kill someone, and kill them fast?"  
  
(Naraku growls and pulls out a sword from nowhere. Shippou squeaks)  
  
Voiceover: "Don't worry. We do too."  
  
(And with that, we head to the next and last dream . . . Inuyasha's. . . .)  
  
Inuyasha: (Looks bored) "Kagome, I need a toy to play with."  
  
Kagome: "Why don't you play with your Naraku the Monkey Man action figure?"  
  
Inuyasha: "Oh yeah! Great idea Kagome!"(goes off, and comes back with a 12 inch figure of Naraku)  
  
Voiceover: "Girls and boys, demons and humans alike, of all ages love the new Naraku the Monkey Man figure. Not only is it fun to smash into the pavement, but you can also put on his monkey costume and take it off!"  
  
Inuyasha: (Pulls off the monkey outfit, and then goes to pull off Naraku's clothes and exchange them with Barbie clothes)  
  
Naraku Doll: "Hey, watch it mister!"  
  
Voiceover: "That's right! The Naraku the Monkey Man action figure ALSO talks to you!"  
  
Naraku Doll: "You suck."  
  
Voiceover: "And lowers your self esteem!"  
  
Naraku Doll: "You will take over the world for me. You will take over the world for me."  
  
Voiceover: "All the while planting messages in your brain to want to take over the world!"  
  
Inuyasha: "Must take over world for my Naraku doll!"  
  
Naraku Doll: "I am not a doll!"  
  
Voiceover: "The Naraku the Monkey Man action figure is guaranteed to be safe for all ages!"  
  
(A small chibi Inuyasha is shown choking on the head, which came off fairly easy)  
  
Voiceover: "Not to mention all your friends will be jelous)  
  
(Inuyasha shows the figure to Shippou, Sesshoumaru and Kagome. The only one who looks even remotely interested is Shippou)  
  
Shippou: "Can I pull his head off?"  
  
Voiceover: "Yes, the Naraku the Monkey Man action figure. Not sold in stores."  
  
(Back to the village, Sesshoumaru, Naraku, Inuyasha, Kagome and Sango all wake up, screaming)  
  
Kagome: "Worst dream ever!"  
  
Sango: "What the hell did I drink last night?"  
  
Naraku: "I am disturbed."  
  
Sesshoumaru: "Me too."  
  
Inuyasha: "Ha ha! Naraku the Monkey Man doll!"  
  
Naraku: "HEY!" (Naraku lunges at Inuyasha, who dodges and they begin fighting. Everyone comes to watch, except Shippou)  
  
Shippou: (Smiles and looks at a small amulet in his hand) "Manipulating people's dreams is so fun!"  
A/N: Ah, you will notice, yes, that Shippou appears in everyone's dreams but doesn't have his own? Sweet dreams, everyone. ^_^ 


	2. Part Two

Part Two. Sorry about leaving out Miroku's dream last time. Doink. What was I thinking? Well, to make up for that . . .  
  
~~~What's In A Dream Anyway?~~~  
  
(Setting. Same village. Different day. Different people sitting around the fire. Erm, Sesshy-chan, Miroku-kun, Sango-chan, Inuyasha-kun and Shippou- chan to be exact. Naraku-kun and Kagome-chan are nowhere to be seen. Oh, and the Japanese ending tags to their names aren't important at all. I mean it! Not important! So get it out of your mind!)  
  
Sesshoumaru: (Sniff) "My hair is all dirty."  
  
Inuyasha: "Go to hell."  
  
Sesshoumaru: "I'll refrain from commenting, dear brother."  
  
Shippou: "Ya know Inuyasha, you REALLY need to come up with better insults."  
  
Inuyasha: "Go to hell Shippou."  
  
Miroku: "Now, now, you shouldn't be so harsh with him."  
  
Inuyasha: (Glares at Miroku)  
  
Shippou: (Smiles innocently) "Yeah!"  
  
Inuyasha: (To Miroku) "You wouldn't think he's so nice if he had manipulated YOUR dream too." (Pauses) "Feh."  
  
Shippou: (Looks innocent)  
  
Miroku: "Well, yes, there is that tiny little detail, but . . . yeah."  
  
Sango: "Miroku, it is best if you stop while you're ahead and -" (Is cut off by Sesshoumaru)  
  
Sesshoumaru: (In an loud outburst) "THAT'S IT! I CAN'T STAND NOT HAVING MY ROSE SHAMPOO!" (He storms off)  
  
Inuyasha: "This ain't gonna end well." (Pauses) "I mean, he DID call me a smelly half-breed, which I, for one, think is perfect excuse to steal that shampoo."  
  
Miroku: "You can say that again. It's certainly not going to end well." (Pauses) "I'm going to get some sleep before he decides to kill us all."  
  
Sango: (Blinks) "How could you feel safer asleep than awake?"  
  
Miroku: "Well, I know that while I'm asleep, you'll be at my side . . ."  
  
Sango: "I will not! Pervert!"  
  
Miroku: "Ah, well, I tried." (Goes off)  
  
(Inuyasha, Sango and Shippou stare at each other for a minute before all getting up and going to sleep again)  
  
Inuyasha: (Calls over his shoulder to Shippou) "If you even touch that amulet, I'll kill you!"  
  
Shippou: "Go to hell, Inuyasha!"  
  
Inuyasha: (Grumbles) "And don't steal my brilliant insults!"  
  
(And so . . . . everyone is asleep again . . . of course, that means it's time for dreams . . . and who's shall we see first? Why, Kagome-chan's of course! Doesn't everyone want to know where she was when she wasn't at the campfire? Don't worry! You'll never find out! *Mwa hahahahha* Umm, anyhow. Her dream opens up in a office supply store, in the staples section)  
  
Kagome: "And I need the pink stapler and those red staples . . ."  
  
Voiceover: "Notecards and More Inc. We have everything you need."  
  
Kagome: "Ah! They even have them in green! That looks like barf."   
  
Voiceover: "Notecards and More Inc. We even have everything you don't ever want."  
  
(Suddenly Sesshoumaru and Inuyasha come in the room, arguing loudly)  
  
Inuyasha: "I WANT IT!"  
  
Sesshoumaru: "I saw it first, it's MINE!"  
  
Kagome: (Peers and sees they are fighting over a pink notecard) (Blinks)  
  
Inuyasha: "Come on you guys! I seriously want this!"  
  
Sesshoumaru: "Well, I do too!"  
  
Kagome: "This is Notecard and More Inc . . . shouldn't there be more notecards?"  
  
Inuyasha: "Oh, sure, there is. But they're not pink!"  
  
(Suddenly, with a pop, Shippou appears, and steals the notecard, and burns it)  
  
Inuyasha/Sesshoumaru: "NOOOO!" (They cry, holding on to each other, before they realize what they're doing and quickly jumping away from each other)  
  
Kagome: "Only one notecard? Must be false advertising."  
  
Voiceover: "Notecards and More Inc. This is not-" (Cough coughistoo cough) "False advertisement."  
  
(The next dream we visit will this time be . . .Sango's again! Yay! Her dream opens up in a nondescript room)  
  
Sango: (In a 'you can get help' voice) "Sleep is overrated."  
  
Naraku: (Comes in with a pop) "Hey! I'm supposed to do the 'you can get help' dreams!"  
  
Sango: (Ignores Naraku) "Sleep is overrated."  
  
Naraku: "At least I said different things." (Pouts)  
  
Sango: (Still ignores Naraku) "Sleep is overrated."  
  
Naraku: (Pokes Sango)  
  
Sango: (Falls over, sleeping)  
  
Voiceover: "Do you have a sleeping problem and refuse to acknowledge it?"  
  
Naraku: (Pokes Sango with a stick) "Actually, I think she's dead."  
  
Voiceover: "Don't wait until it's too late to acknowledge them. Get help."  
  
(Who's dream is next? How about . . .Miroku? In his dream, we find ourselves in a small room with a ton of perfume)  
  
Miroku: "All of this perfume smells so good .. ." (Smiles at the lady at the counter) "Would you . . . like to bear my child?"  
  
Lady: "Excuse me?"  
  
Miroku: "Would you like to bear my child?"  
  
Lady: "Sorry, come again?"  
  
Miroku: (Blinks) "Would you like to bear my child??"  
  
Voiceover: "Do you ever feel like you're not getting heard?"  
  
Lady: "Sorry, can't understand you!"  
  
Voiceover: "It COULD be because-" (Voice gets dark) "-You're speaking in a DIFFERENT language."  
  
Miroku: (Says in English instead of Japanese this time) "Would you like to bear my child?"  
  
Lady: "No way! Pervert!"  
  
Voiceover: "Enroll in language classes today."  
  
Shippou: (Pops in and laughs at Miroku) "There is a such thing as knowing too much . . ."  
  
Miroku: (Glares and groans)  
  
(Whose dream next? Why, of course, Sessy-chan!!! His dream takes place in a candy store . . . .)  
  
Sesshoumaru: "I do not want candy, I want my rose shampoo!"  
  
Inuyasha: "And I want to be a demon and do you see that ever happening???"  
  
Sesshoumaru: "Inuyasha! Get out!" (Attacks him and beats him up)  
  
Naraku: "Wow . . . that's a lot of blood. Too bad this isn't real life."  
  
Inuyasha: "Ah, shuddap!"  
  
Voiceover: "Need we say anything?"  
  
(Leaving the bloody carnage behind, we go to one last dream . . . Inuyasha's! Yes, he's all healed from Sesshoumaru's dream =p Anyhow, his dream starts up in a nondescript room)  
  
Inuyasha: (Has the remains of a Naraku the Monkey Man doll around him) "The Naraku the Monkey Man doll broke!" (Tears threaten to spill forth)  
  
Voiceover: "That's ok, kids! We have a new toy for you!"  
  
Inuyasha: "I'm not a kid!"  
  
Voiceover: "Shut up. Anyhow, the new doll is the Sesshoumaru-chan Fluffy Doll!"  
  
Inuyasha: (Suddenly is holding a Sesshoumaru-chan Fluffy doll) "Wow! It's a Sesshoumaru-chan Fluffy Doll."  
  
Voiceover: "The Sesshoumaru-chan Fluffy Doll, just like the Naraku the Monkey Man doll, talks to you!"  
  
Sesshoumaru Doll: "I'm so pretty, aren't I?"  
  
Voiceover: "And sings too!"  
  
Sesshoumaru Doll: "I feel so pretty! Oh so pretty!"  
  
Inuyasha: (Looks scared)  
  
Voiceover: "All the while planting messages in your brain that you are worthless and not pretty."  
  
Sesshoumaru Doll: "You are worthless. You are worthless. You suck. I'm pretty, you are not."  
  
Inuyasha: (Looks about to cry again)  
  
Voiceover: "The Sesshoumaru-chan Fluffy Doll. Not available anywhere."  
  
Shippou: (Comes in and steals the doll) (Leaves)  
  
Inuyasha: "HEY! GIVE THAT BACK!" (Chases)  
  
(The dreams all end here . .. and we find ourselves back at the campfire. Everyone, save for Shippou and Naraku are there . . )  
  
Sesshoumaru: "Actually, I rather liked my dream."  
  
Inuyasha: (Shudders)  
  
Kagome: "Mine was so demented!"  
  
Sango: "It was stupid!"  
  
Miroku: "Shippou was in my dream . . ."  
  
Inuyasha: "Mine too . . ."  
  
Kagome: "And mine!"  
  
Inuyasha: "He wouldn't dare do that again, would he?" (Pauses) "Kill him!"  
  
(They go off to find Shippou, and find Naraku instead, holding the dream amulet)  
  
Kagome: "Naraku?"  
  
Naraku: "Yes, silly girl. I can change my form at any time, remember? But dammit, you were supposed to blame this on Shippou!"  
  
Inuyasha: "You idiot!"  
  
Sesshoumaru: "Naraku!!"  
  
Naraku: "What?"  
  
Sesshoumaru: "Thanks for letting me have a good dream, then!" (Smiles happily) "Now, if only I had my rose shampoo. . ."  
  
Inuyasha: (Rolls eyes) "This is so pointless." 


End file.
